pink doughnuts

Homer Ipsum

Doh! Kids are great. You can teach them to hate what you hate and, with the Internet and all, they practically raise themselves. My beer! You never had a chance to become my urine! A gun is not a weapon, it’s a tool, like a hammer or a screwdriver or an alligator. If God didn’t want me to eat chicken in church, then he would have made gluttony a sin. You can have all the money in the world, but there’s one thing you will never have… a dinosaur.

Just sit through this NRA meeting Marge, and if you still don’t think guns are great then we’ll argue some more. I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here. Stupidity got us into this mess, and stupidity will get us out. Kids, just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I’m not listening. English? Who needs that? I’m never going to England. Operator! Give me the number for 911! Trying is the first step towards failure. A woman is a lot like a refrigerator: 6 feet tall, 300 pounds… it makes ice. Trying is the first step towards failure. Marge, you know it’s rude to talk when my mouth is full.

Kids are great. You can teach them to hate what you hate and, with the Internet and all, they practically raise themselves. I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here. I thought I had an appetite for destruction, but all I wanted was a club sandwich. Vampires are make-believe, just like elves, gremlins and Eskimos. Marge, you know it’s rude to talk when my mouth is full. If God didn’t want me to eat chicken in church, then he would have made gluttony a sin. Operator! Give me the number for 911! Kids are great. You can teach them to hate what you hate and, with the Internet and all, they practically raise themselves. My beer! You never had a chance to become my urine! Marge, you know it’s rude to talk when my mouth is full. I thought I had an appetite for destruction, but all I wanted was a club sandwich.

When will I learn? The answer to life’s problems aren’t at the bottom of a bottle, they’re on TV! Just sit through this NRA meeting Marge, and if you still don’t think guns are great then we’ll argue some more. Oh yeah, what are you gonna do? Release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouths and when they bark, they shoot bees at you? Just sit through this NRA meeting Marge, and if you still don’t think guns are great then we’ll argue some more. I’m like that guy who single-handedly built the rocket & flew to the moon. What was his name? Apollo Creed? I’ve learned that life is one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead.

I like my beer cold… my TV loud… and my homosexuals flaming. A gun is not a weapon, it’s a tool, like a hammer or a screwdriver or an alligator. If I could say a few words… I would be a better public speaker. I wish God were alive to see this. You’re everywhere. You’re omnivorous. If God didn’t want me to eat chicken in church, then he would have made gluttony a sin. Roads are just a suggestion Marge, just like pants. I’ll make the money by selling one of my livers… I can get by with one. I hope I didn’t brain my damage.